March 5, 1997 The play: http://the-tech.mit.edu/Shakespeare/History/1kinghenryiv/1kinghenryiv.2.4.html The cast: [*log_imp] * NAME CHANGE: Puck(#8651) to Prince_Henry [*log_imp] * NAME CHANGE: Gorto(#9467) to Gadshill [*log_imp] * NAME CHANGE: MacDuff(#9593) to Falstaff [*log_imp] * NAME CHANGE: Barkley(#1132) to Poins [*log_imp] * NAME CHANGE: Cocoa(#51744) to Peto The theatre: [public] Prince_Henry has left this channel. [public] Prince_Henry has joined this channel. [public] Peto has left this channel. [public] Peto has joined this channel. [public] Gadshill has left this channel. [public] Poins has left this channel. [public] Gadshill has joined this channel. [public] Poins has joined this channel. [public] sunn: okay what is going on here The houselights dim.... [public] Prince_Henry raises the curtain once more.... [public] Prince_Henry: Speak sirs,; how was it? [public] Gadshill: We four set upon some dozen- [public] Falstaff: Sixteen at least, my lord. [public] Gadshill: And bound them. [public] Peto: no, no they were not bound [public] Queen has left this channel. [public] Falstaff: YOu rogue, they were bound, every man of them, or I am a Jew else--an Ebrew Jew [public] Gadshill: As we were sharing, some six or seven fresh men set upon us- [public] Falstaff: And unbound the rest, and then come in the other. [public] Prince_Henry: What, fought ye with them all? [public] Falstaff: All? I knownow what you call all, but if I fought not with 50 of them, I am a bunch of radish! [public] Falstaff: If there were not two or three and fifty upon poor Jack, then am I no two-legged creature. [public] Prince_Henry: Pray God, you have not murdered some of them? [public] Falstaff: Nay, that's past praying for. I have peppered two of them. [public] Falstaff: Two I am sure I have paid, two rogues in buckram suits. [public] Falstaff: I tell thee what, Hal--if I tell thee a lie, spit in my face, call me horse. [public] Falstaff: Thou knowest my old ward. Here I lay, and thus I bore my point. Four rogues in buckram let drive at me. [public] Prince_Henry: What, four? Thou saidst but two even now. [public] Falstaff: Four Hal, I told thee four. [public] Poins: ay, ay, he said four. [public] Falstaff: These four came all afront and mainly thrust at me. I made me no more ado but took all their seven points in my targe thus. [public] Prince_Henry: Seven? why there were but four even now in buckram [public] Poins: ay, four in buckram suits. [public] Falstaff: In buckram? [public] Falstaff: Seven, by these hills, or I am a villain else. [public] Prince_Henry: Pry'thee, let him alone; we shall have more anon. [public] Falstaff: Dost thou hear me, Hal? [public] Prince_Henry: ay, and mark thee too, Jack. [public] Falstaff: Do so, for it is worth the listning to. These nine in buckram that I told thee of... [public] Prince_Henry: So, two more already. [public] Falstaff: Their points being broken [public] Poins: down fell their hose. [public] brennuS: what the heck? [public] Falstaff: Began to give me ground; but I followed me close, came in, foot and hand, and with a thought seven of the eleven I paid. [public] Prince_Henry: O monstrous! eleven buckram men grown out of two! [public] Falstaff: But as the devil would have it, three misbegotten knaves in Kendal green came at my back and let me drive at me; fir it was so dark, Hal, that thou couldst not see thy hand [public] Prince_Henry: These lies are like the father that begets them, --gross as a mountain, open, palpable. [public] Prince_Henry: Why, though clay-brained guts, thou nott-pated fool, thou whoreson, obscene, greasy, tallow keech. [*log_imp] * NAME CHANGE: Gadshill(#9467) to Falstaff. [*log_imp] * NAME CHANGE: Falstaff(#9593) to Gadshill [public] Falstaff.: What, art thou mad? art thou mad? Is not the truth the truth? [*log_imp] * NAME CHANGE: Falstaff.(#9467) to Falstaff [public] MemberOfTheAudience blinks. [public] Prince_Henry: Why, how couldst thou know these men in Kendal green, when it was so dark thou couldst not see they hand? come tell us your reason? What sayest thou to this? [public] sunn: spoofing? [public] Poins: come, your reason jack, - your reason. [public] Falstaff: What, upon compulsion? Zounds, an I were at the strappado, or all the racks in the world, I would not tell you on compulsion. [public] MemberOfTheAudience: spoofer: would you care to identify yourself? [public] Falstaff: Give you a reason on compulsion! if reasone were as plentiful as blackberries, I would give no man a reason upon compulsion, I. [public] Prince_Henry: I'll be no longer guilty of this sin; this sanguine coward, this bed presser, this horse back breaker, this huge hill of flesh-- [public] sunn is lost [public] mirror: please. you are are almost as annoying as I am. [public] Falstaff: 'Sblood, you starveling, you elf-skin, you dried neat's tongue, you bull's-pizzle, you stock-fish! [public] Prince_Henry: Well, breathe awhile, and then to it again: and when thou hast tired theyself in base comparisons, hear me speak but this. [public] Poins: mark, jack. [public] Falstaff: O for breath to utter what is like thee! You tailor's yard, you sheath, you bow-case.. [public] Prince_Henry: well, breathe awhile and then to it again: and when thou hast tired theyself in base comparisons, hear me speak but this. [public] Poins: mark, jack. [public] Prince_Henry: We two saw you four set on four; you bound them, and were masters of their wealth. [public] Prince_Henry: mark now, how a plain tale shall put you down. --- [public] brennuS: actually, don't tell us the tale... [public] Prince_Henry: then did we two set on your four and, with a word, out-faced you from your prize and have it; yea, and can show it you here in the house: [public] Prince_Henry: and Falstaff, you carried your guts away as mibly, with as quick desterity, and roared for mercy and still ran and roared as ever I heard bull calf. What a slave art tou, to hack thy sword as thou hast done and then say it was a fight. [public] Prince_Henry: what a trick, what device, what starting-hole, canst thou now find out to hide thee from this open and apparent shame? [*log_imp] * NAME CHANGE: Peto(#51744) to Hostess [public] Poins: come, let's hear, jack. what trick hast thou now? [public] Falstaff: By the Lord, I knew ye as well as he that made ye. Was it for me to kill the heir apparent? The lion will not touch the true prince. But by the Lord, lads, I am glad you have the money. Hostess, clap to the doors: watch tonight, pray tomorrow. [public] Falstaff: Gallants, lads, boys, hearts of gold, all the titles of good fellowship come unto you! [public] MemberOfTheAudience: tell me... are you going to quote that whole play? or whatever it is that you are quoting? [public] Falstaff: What, shall we be merry? Shall we have a play extempore? [public] brennuS: um, could I just have a hamburger instead? [public] Prince_Henry: Content; --and the arguement shall be thy running away. [public] Gadshill: Whsst! [public] MemberOfTheAudience: hi there, Gadshill. nice new name.. [public] Falstaff: Ah, no more of that, Hal, an thou lovest me! [public] Hostess: O Jesu, my lord the prince! [public] Prince_Henry: How now, my lady hostess!--what sayest thou to me? [public] Hostess: Marry, my lord, there is a nobleman of the court at [public] Hostess: door would speak with you: he says he comes from your fatherrrrrrrrrr [public] medusa has left this channel. [public] Gadshill takes a bow [public] Prince_Henry bows regally. [public] Hostess curtseys [public] Poins bow wows. [public] Falstaff: Thank you, thank you very much. You've been a wonderful audience. Good night, Mrs. Calibash, whereever you are...-erk! [public] Falstaff is yanked offstage. [public] Announcer: this play has been brought to you by the mentors of MicroMUSE. We hope you enjoyed it. [public] brennuS bows. [public] Barkley has joined this channel. [public] Cocoa hees [public] Gorto: Thanks, brennuS. We couldn't have done it without you. [public] brennuS: thank you, thank you. Please, no more accolades. Yes, yes, I was quite good. [public] MacDuff: the peanut gallery lent the perfect touch! [public] Gorto: Yep, as The Yokel In The Back, you're unsurpassable. ;) [public] MacDuff applauds [public] brennuS: the surprise part of it was a nice touch... [public] Cocoa: oops, i was going to log off an hour ago and check my phone messages before it was too late to call someone... as usual it too late :) [public] MemberOfTheAudience: if I may inquire, was there any particular reason for this presentation? [public] Gorto: Kind of like an ambush... [public] Gorto: Yeah, culture. [public] Puck: It was fun! [public] MemberOfTheAudience: huhu? wuzzat? [public] Puck: Besides, you folks were being too quiet! [public] MemberOfTheAudience: oh. fun? yeah, that I can understand. [public] Gorto laughs. [public] Puck: We thought we'd wake you up. [public] sunn: it is very active here tonight [public] Gorto: Was it confusing as well, sunn? [public] Wildweed points ahead and wonders what aws behind him [public] sunn: it is always confusing [public] Gorto: 'Cause if not, I don't really feel I've done my job... [public] brennuS was thoroughly confused... you did your jobs well... [public] Gorto: Huzzah! [public] Puck: that was the intent! [public] sunn feels like a lost child [public] Puck: If you want to know more about Falstaff, Prince Henry, Poins, Gadshill and Peto, you can pick up a copy of Henry IV, the first part by William Shakespeare at your local library. [grand] Puck: this PBS moment has been brought to you be several crazy people. [public] Gorto: Or read the Cliff's Notes, if you're both pretentious and lazy. [public] Barkley: even if you *don't* want to know, you can still pick up the book. [public] brennuS: hey, I'm both pretentious and lazy! Cliff's Notes must be for me!!!